Far Above Rubies

Woman's Voice

Far Above Rubies

The Woman’s Voice

by

Shanti

“Push! Push! Just a little while longer, you’re almost done!” She screams, piercing the ear drums of those around her. “We see the head! Young lady, give me one more huge push!” She lets out her last cry clothed with excruciating pain; her body is weak yet simultaneously strong as she holds on. Suddenly, her mind is shifted quickly from the unbearable pain to a beautiful sound. It’s a soft, but stern, strong sound; a cry of freedom and excitement as the new born is welcomed into the new world. She holds the baby passionately in her velvet like arms filled with an immense amount of unbreakable love. She calls the baby’s name, they look deeply into each other’s eyes and as the baby stares at her, “she [softly] opens her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness (Proverbs 31:26).’I will be the best mother I can be. Nothing in this world will hinder me from providing for you, from protecting you and from loving you unconditionally. Even when I am not physically present, my prayers will keep you from all hurt, harm and danger. Angels will go out of their way to protect you. I am your mother and I will honor my promise.'” As she finishes, the baby smiles and gently closes one eye first and the next one follows; feeling at peace because she knew by the slow, smooth beats of her mother’s heart and the sincere sound of her voice, she made a genuine promise.

 Woman's Voice 2

When a mother speaks, her voice is as the sweet, thick honey from an enchanting honeycomb. Words drizzle out of her mouth and stick and embrace her child’s heart. In her tongue lies the sword, not to kill with kindness or oppress the soul but to show her strength and authority; no matter what her tone may be, she means what she says and she says what she means. But there’s nothing like “that beautiful voice which [makes] everything she [says] sound like a caress (Virginia Woolf). That caressing sound that assures you she will provide, not only physically, but also mentally and spiritually. Necessities are always taken care of. It took me a while to understand how my mom always made something out of nothing. Even if there was a moment that involved a monetary issue, everything I needed seemed as if it appeared like magic. I always had shoes, clothes, food and even toys; never a worry on my end because I knew that the situation was under control. Like the roaring mother bear that protects their cubs, they are thankfully blessed to be unselfish and put their children before themselves. Most mothers are the spiritual leaders for their children as well as counselors. Those times where kids teased at school you went to your mom hurt and in need of comfort or when you felt life just wasn’t treating you right, her angelic voice spoke life and rebuked the negativity over our lives; giving a sense of hope and faith in ourselves. She became the moon that lit up our dark skies. She would be on her knees continuously praying to God; sending her requests on behalf of her children. And by the sound of her voice the angels would comply.

 Woman's Voice 4

A mother mastered the utterance of silence; one of the many keys to motherhood, which we call patience. I’m sure all mothers would agree that, at times, children can get pretty demanding; when they want something it’s NOW OR NEVER. I find it amazing how a mother can immediately turn on the “patience” switch and when that happens, the elements in the world somehow join forces with her to guide her to victory. These versatile voiced women, tend to create balance and control as if they were all experts in Pilates; the yin and yang in our lives; the doves sent from heaven that represent the selfless love and the sacrifice every mother makes for the well-being of their offspring.

Mothers weren’t the only gifts from God; another wonderful creation was the wife, made from the very mans rib. “Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies” (Proverbs 31:10). A wife is more than a husband’s physical romanticist, but by the power of her voice she attracts him mentally and emotionally. Men want a woman that is so far greater than any precious ruby in the world. A wife speaks with beauty and passion, as the sound of a well-played violin, whispering like the wind and warm like a blanket, massaging the heart of her true love she mirrors. In the same manner the words melodically flow out of her mouth, encompassing his ears causing his heart, mind and soul to simultaneously melt like butter. Her sultry voice caresses him which strokes him like fingers. Both lovers synchronize as partners in starting their new life journey.

 Woman's Voice 6

Being a wife is a great responsibility but also a great opportunity to reveal to your husband that he has found a loyal companion, a gentle lover and respectful woman. “[Marriage] is a partnership of two unique people who bring out the very best in each other and who know that even though they are wonderful as individuals, they even are better together” (Barbara Cage). She is trustworthy like the inner core of a best friend’s relationship. They can talk about pretty much anything. And while she speaks, he gazes at her, hearing beauty come out of her like the breath-taking view of the sun setting over the horizon. Like the dew in the morning, her words gently rest upon his heart. Unfortunately, not always will this journey becandy and butterflies, that’s not the way life works. It is as a newly planted tree, in order for it to stand strong and survive the storm it has to be watered and fed daily; given love and care allowing the roots to run deep down to grasp their souls. And you’ll know of a surety that “it shall not be moved.” The more time it has to grow the more beautiful, healthy and full it will become. She speaks as the soil, supporting him in his endeavors; keeping him grounded. The sun that shines and gives life, so is her voice which produces that fiery passion and glorious light. And her whispers are as the mirror of his soul. 

Being a good wife and mother is a woman’s calling and with the strength of their voice they “hold up half the sky.”

Woman's Voice 5

Blurred Vision, Part 3

I put part one and two into this blog via video and audio, now we’ll switch things up a bit and put pen to paper.  I spoke from the hip in the first two installments but I have a feeling this one is going to open me up even more.  When you write, your thoughts become clearer and more focused.  I think this will help me bring some essential nuggets to the surface, things that aren’t very easy to share.

Maybe that’s the point though.  The more painful the disclosure the more helpful the message??  We’ll see.

Blurred Vision part 3

In the first two segments I touched on a process that leads to false happiness or hollow fulfillment.  There is a game of deception that goes on with many men…and I speak of men because I am one and this tends to happen to us allot.  I’m sure my sister folk experience this too but with men it is especially potent because we are visual creatures by design.

The eye is the first barrier that breaks down in this game of deception.  William Shakespeare is purported to have said that the eyes are the window to the soul.  I don’t know if that’s true of him or not.  But, I do believe that Jesus said, “The eye is the lamp of the body.  If your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light.  But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness” (Matt. 6:22-23).  My take on this is that we become deeply affected by what we see.  The eye serves as a gateway to the inner man.  So it follows that when we are led astray it often begins with what we see…or think we see (I think if Adam and Eve were here they might lend credible testimony to this).

Now in previous posts I shared about my early experience with pornography and how crippling it was to me emotionally and spiritually.  What I didn’t share was how the transformation worked within me to revive my fallen nature and create a false new man, a false new person driven by internal lusts and appetites.

Once you get this thing inside of you it becomes an alternate voice, a quiet whisper in the night, something always lurking in the subconscious waiting for an opportunity to express its need.  There are times when you can suppress it and ignore or obscure it with some other activity.  In most cases, however, it only ducks its head and waits.  It presents itself as a deep, longing void, an empty space that nothing can fill except for the object being presented.

When it is active and unrestrained, it alters your vision.  Remember, vision leads to life and prosperity because without it we perish.  So if your vision is changed, altered, diluted, obscured or outright changed, then so also is your life.  This deception that worked within me changed my vision often.  I thought I saw what was good for me and once I thought it…once it materialized in my mind (Law of Attraction) it came to me.  What I saw showed up in my life and since I thought it was good and right it was easy to pursue.  I saw things I thought I wanted, things I thought I needed.  These things manifested in my inner thoughts and added to the poison already coursing through my spirit.

Blurred Vision part 3 v2This game of deception is very cruel and takes no prisoners.  It will make you lie to yourself, to your friends and family, to anyone in order to justify itself.  You begin to really believe the lie.  In the process lives are hurt and other people pay a price for your changed vision.  The crazy thing is that the more you meditate on this new thing, the stronger it becomes.  It’s almost like a self-fulfilling prophecy.  I had an affair and in this affair I was actually sure beyond a doubt that the grass was greener on the other side.  I told myself so many lies just to make the new reality work, to make the pieces fit nicely.  I hammered out any rough edges and called it a job well done because the product suited my altered vision.

The more I dwelt on the object presented to me by the deception, the more real it became.  Literally, the thing I saw in my mind came true in almost every detail.  The details in turn fed the hunger.  I was so lost.  I was so hurt inside and didn’t even know it.  I was dying.  This thing was like a cancer that grew unchecked.  I know that over time the symptoms started to show and those around me that loved me and cared about me prayed.  I will discuss the cure later but for now suffice it to say that there was no treatment…not as long as what I thought I saw…I thought was real!

Men and brothers, there is a way to break out of the game of deception.  I hope you come back for the next installment where I will begin to share with you how I broke this cycle and regained my true and clear vision!

Patience, Love & Time

Relationships 4by

Shanti

“I no longer believed in the idea of soul mates, or love at first sight. But I was beginning to believe that a very few times in your life, if you were lucky, you might meet someone who was exactly right for you. Not because he was perfect, or because you were, but because you’re combined flaws were arranged in a way that allowed two separate beings to hinge together.” Lisa Kleypas, author of the Blue-Eyed Devil, revealed the secret that was so visible but disguised by my own finite understanding. A quote that finally made sense after many confused attempts to find “the one.” Because I was single with the wrong mindset, a life-changing opportunity was able to rise. Patience, love and time exposed themselves; three clever attributes that forced me to comply whether I liked it or not!

I was never really into the whole relationship/dating thing. As I got older it seemed like that’s all people talked about. It felt like there was a breed of relationships forming; a cycle of “falling in love,” fights, arguments, the up and down roller coaster of l o v e, of course, and then breaking up after a couple months, confused by what love really is; the typical relationship. I, on the other hand, had the chance to observe these faultless disasters. I enjoyed living my life single! I was happy knowing that I was free! Free, to be emotionally unattached to anyone I found attractive. Free, in knowing that I didn’t have to worry about the restraints of someone else’s emotions. No monogamy just me. Ah yes! Emotional freedom, what an awesome feeling! Although, I was surrounded by those who didn’t have this same privilege. I was devoted to caring only for myself. I guess you can say I was a little selfish but with good intentions. I didn’t want to waste time with someone I felt wasn’t going to be in my life for very long. I took pleasure in watching those close to me face the inconsistent, functionally dysfunctional aspects, relationships failed to mention; every daunting and heartbreaking, yet gratifying, animated moment they enjoyed that made them feel so alive! Yes, it all made “perfect sense.” So, I continued on in my observation.

After a while of observing, the happiness started fading away slowly, but surely and Relationshipsboredom came into play. I blame the adorable couple I went to school with because I witnessed true love. This couple whom I thought would be like everyone else and end faster than the speed of light; one of life’s great opportunities to prove me wrong. I watched this couple and it was real. Real love! Not like one of those annoyingly, cute romance movies. I couldn’t believe it!  At that very moment the scales began to fall off of my eyes. It felt as if a build up of emotions that had been buried so deep had suddenly awakened and invaded my heart and captured my soul. I wanted to feel what they expressed so heavily. Sooner than expected, I made the decision to find out for myself what the big deal was about being in a relationship. If I was meant to have someone to love and to hold, to care so deeply for and receive that in return, well then I guess I was all for it.

Of course, in my life things just don’t turn out the way I expect it to. I came to learn that if eager to find love I would look in all the wrong places. I grew weary and impatient. I was sick of waiting for my soul mate; my knight in shining armour; my true love. I wanted to do anything. I wanted to be anyone if that meant that I could finally know what real love is. Disregarding good intentions, now I was just selfish. After a couple years of merciless and frivolous searching, I came up empty-handed, or in my case empty-hearted. I dated and mistakenly went into every relationship thinking “this is it! He’s definitely the one.” WRONG! I was defeated by loves’ harsh laws and walked with my head held down. Casually, I made the decision to continue my journey alone. I chose to go back to the way I used to be, unfortunately this time it was different. My heart cried knowing that I had no one to connect with; that empty feeling that burned deep down wanting to be filled with the consuming power of love. I felt deceived, hurt, and lonely; like I was a living melody of an awful song.

Subsequently, after feeling depressed because I was unsuccessful at finding love, time was now on my side. Nonetheless, life has a way of enlightening us when we feel we’re at our lowest point. Now here is where patience, love and time plays a unique role in my life. I came to the realization that since it wasn’t quite yet my time to find love I’ll have patience if that means being able to be myself and loved for my flaws, if it means letting go of the illusion of a perfect man but hold on to the man that is perfect for me, than I choose to take my time and wait patiently for my true love.

Patience, love and time have their ways of bringing us back to reality. The insanely genuis way they work is if all three are together. It’s difficult to have one without the other. You have to have all three because you know what they say, “one’s company, two’s a crowd but three…

…three’s a party!!”